Posts tagged biting

Be careful what you do- it’ll come back to bite you


John and Nathan, like all siblings on the entire planet, have moments where they don’t get along too well. Don’t get me wrong, they are great brothers and Nathan is reallly, really good with John. But, of course, they are still brothers. And brothers will get into spats at some point. Sometimes Nathan is the instigator, and believe it or not, sometimes John is. I keep telling Nathan not to pick on his brother because it’s going to come back and bite him. I suppose Nathan didn’t know I meant that literally.

So the other day, Nathan was being disrespectful to me so I put him in time out. While he was in time out, facing the wall, I had to finish doing what I was trying to get done. While I was working, I heard Nathan shrieking, and then John joined in. I hollered for them to be nice to each other and reminded Nathan to stay in time out. A few seconds later, I heard more screeching followed by Nathan crying, “Just leave me a lone John! OWWW! STOP! John that hurts!” I walked into the living room to see what was going on and this is what I found:


Nathan was still in time out, hunched over and sobbing with giant spit circles all over the back of his shirt. Apparently, John had bitten him all over his back while he was sitting there, leaving giant spit circles where he chewed on Nathan’s shirt as he was biting him. I had enough time to quickly snap this picture before I ran outside and erupted in a fit of laughter. I didn’t want Nathan to think I was laughing at him, but I was definitely laughing at the situation. Once I got my laughter under control, I came back inside and put John in time out and told Nathan I was impressed he stayed in timeout while under attack.

Speaking of which, there was another incident where John bit Nathan. Nathan had done something to John- maybe he took away a toy John was playing with. Whatever the reason was, John retaliated by biting Nathan on the rear and clamping down with his teeth and refusing to let go. Nathan was shrieking and running around the house with John’s teeth clamped on his rear like a fox trap.

There is certainly no lack of enterainment around this house!


When Babies Attack


My child is trying to kill me.

Ok, not literally, but sometimes it feels like it. So, I’ve mentioned before that he has teeth now… well, he’s now biting me full force during our nursing sessions. He’s like a maniacal Pac Man, only with teeth. He’s gnawing on everything again, including me. Little bitty ice picks teeth have sprouted through his bottom gums. And guess what? He has two more bulging on the top… that means two more miniature enameled fear mongers teeth are waiting to emerge, biding their time till they can stab at me as well. If it hurts this bad with only two bottom teeth, I can’t even imagine how bad it will be once the top two come through as well. Now, when he bites, it’s like reliving a contraction all over again. So when the top two come through, will it be like a never-ending experience of childbirth? Lord, I hope not.

I’m doing everything I can think to do: I’ve tried unlatching him giving him a stern “No, Nathan. No biting.” He thinks it’s a game. He grins at me, not understanding that he’s causing pain. Once, on accident, I screeched, sounding like a ethereal mix between an angry evil witch and a murderous three-legged hyena. Only because the pain was so intense that a knot of nausea formed in the pit of my stomach, my vision was obscured by a fine white fog, and I thought I was going to pass out. When this happened, his faced turned into a crumpled ball of pure unhappiness, he thrust out his lower lip, and started bawling giant, glistening Nathan tears. He was just pitiful and it took a few minutes of rubbing his little head and telling him he could still share my quest for world domination to get him to calm down. I was smiling on the inside, secretly hoping my accidental screeching scared him into realizing he can’t bite.

No such luck. In fact, he was scared to nurse during the following session, and after an hour of cajoling, I finally coerced him into feeding. And then he bit me again.

I got on the Internet, which has the answers for everything. I mean everything. Don’t know how to make grilled cheese sandwiches? Google it. Don’t know how to scratch that elusive itch in the middle of your back without using the handle of a ladle? Google it. Well, Google has failed me on this one. I’ve read articles, done the research, and he is still biting.

I bet you’re wondering if I’m reading to give up and wean him. Well, I’m not going to. Don’t get me wrong, it’s very tempting. I would much rather him gnaw on a bottle than on me. I think about it every single time he bites. Every. Single. Time. But I’m not going to give up just yet… I have a few more tricks up my sleeve to try. We’ll see, Mr. Nathan, who has more willpower here. I am bound and determined to make it to at least the one year mark, as recommended by the American Academy of Pediatrics. Once again, we have reached a temporary setback. We’ve had our fair share of problems breastfeeding. We’ve made it this far and overcome all obstacles in our path. What’s one more hurdle to jump? This, too, shall pass. Eventually.


Houston, We Have Teeth



Nathan finally cut his first two teeth! The bottom two have finally pushed through the gums after nearly 3 months of pain. Dealing with an infant who’s teething isn’t exactly on my list of fun things to do. Teething caused Nathan to wake more often during the night, excessive grumpiness, mountains of bibs laden with drool, and his famous hand gnawing.

Nathan’s teething started when he was around three months old. He began drooling like a ravenous lion who smells fresh food and could completely saturate numerous bibs with all the drool he produced. He started chewing and gnawing on his hands and fingers like a miniature budding cannibal. The poor little guy was miserable.

We tried numerous remedies from well-meaning friends and family. We gave him chilled washcloths to chew on, but he just grimaced and threw them to the side like a professional chef throwing out rotten food; with disdain. We tried refrigerating some teething rings that had liquid in them, but he didn’t like those either. We even had some of my husband’s teethers from when he was a baby… one of which included a giant plastic white key ring with a handful of plastic keys. Nathan liked it, but he preferred to play with it rather than chew on it. He would raise his fist into the air and shake the keys at me, his eyes dancing merrily. He loved passing the key ring from one slobbery fist to the other, watching this transaction intently and with seriousness as the keys rattled against each other. After a few passes back and forth between fists, a look of boredom would inevitably develop on his face and he would fling the keys into the air, unmindful of where they landed. The first few times he threw them on the ground, I picked them up, washed them, and returned them to his greedily awaiting hands. I could see the mischievousness sparkle in those blue eyes and he would toss the keys back onto the floor, laughing jovially.

“Mommy’s not playing this game, buddy,” I told him lightly. “You can either play with your keys, or you can throw them on the floor and not get them back.” I doubt he understood me, but his eyebrows furrowed and his eyes narrowed slightly as if he was diligently trying to decipher what I was saying. When I handed them back, however, he decided to fling them onto to floor again. I left them there for a while. 

One of my friends told me her daughter loved chewing on frozen waffles, so I decided to give that a try. When I held the waffle to his mouth, he smiled and attempted to chew on it, murmuring and making cute little baby noises that made me think he liked it. As soon as I took my hand away, however, the waffle flopped down and he looked at me as if he was wondering exactly how this whole thing was supposed to work.

“You’re supposed to chew on it, Nathan,” I explained, holding up the waffle.

“Rar rar rar rar rar.” He said matter-of-factly. “Nya nya nya nya.”

“Ok, you don’t have to chew on it. We’ll eventually find something you can teethe on.”

“Rar rar rar rar rar,” he replied as he scissor-legged happily.

Next on the list was Baby Orajel. It worked quite well and he seemed to deal with the gel numbing the surrounding area like a champ. Once when I applied the gel to his bulging gums, he stuck his tongue out and licked a glob of it off. A few minutes later, his tongue dangled freely from his mouth, drool flowing down it like a waterslide. He tried to babble to me, but his tongue was in the way, making his speech sound thick.

I decided to try the gel on myself, just to see how potent it was.

I rubbed some on my gums and a few minutes later, my gum was numb.

Along with my tongue.

And the inside of my cheek.

And a random spot in the back of my throat.

So the gel works… it’s just quite annoying to have other places go numb as well.

Next, we tried Humphrey’s Teething Tablets, which were great because they don’t cause any numbness and are a homeopathic, all natural remedy. Nathan loved them. They come in tablets, which you dissolve in a small amount of water, and they can also be purchased in strips, which you place directly in your baby’s mouth. We purchased the tablets, which work wonders and have very little discernable taste. The only thing I don’t like about them is they take about 5 minutes to dissolve… which seems like an eternity when you have a screaming teether thrashing angrily in your arms.

Ever since Nathan’s bottom teeth have finally appeared, his cannibalism attempts have waned somewhat, although not completely.

Two down, 18 more baby teeth to go…

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