Posts tagged pee

A little machine

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I cannot believe my baby is two weeks old already.

I’ve been in a daze consisting of getting very little sleep and nursing and changing a trillion diapers. I am not even kidding. In the past two weeks, we’ve gone through so many diapers that I could totally build an igloo out of all the ones we’ve used. Except not really, because who wants to live in a diaper igloo that smells like baby poop and pee?

We have some really awesome cloth diapers, except we can’t use them until John’s bowels kinda regulate somewhat. He’s going through about 15-20 diapers a day right now, and this mama doesn’t have the time or energy to wash that many cloth diapers at the moment. I figure once he’s around 4-6 weeks old or thereabouts, we’ll make the switch then.

This baby has the craziest poop habits. He’ll go a few hours without dirtying a diaper. And then he’ll pee. No problem, right? Simple little pee. Just need to change it. So I’ll get him all changed and stuff and then BAM! He poops in the clean diaper. And so I’ll go through the process of unswaddling him & undressing him, get him changed and redressed and reswaddled and WHAM! Another poop in the clean diaper. I’ll wait a couple minutes and move his legs around to get any more poop out. When nothing happens, I again go through the process of unswaddling him and undressing him. I change the diaper, but this time I don’t get the clean one on fast enough and he showers me with pee. So I’ll finally get a clean diaper on him, turn my head, and yep… he’ll pee again.

He is a peeing and pooping MACHINE.

We’ll go through 6-8 diapers in a row because of this. I’m looking forward to his little bowels getting more regular because it’s rough to spend 30 minute increments just changing one diaper after another. My sweet baby. I plan on reminding him of this when he’s older…

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Pee Pellets. Yes, I said Pee Pellets.

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I’m beginning to lose my faith in diapers.

Did you know diapers can malfunction? Seriously, they really can.

I had to change Nathan’s diaper, and as I was getting his pants off, my fingers slid across what felt like a thousand boogers on his leg. Flummoxed, I pulled my up my hand and upon closer inspection, it looked sorta like there was caviar on it.

Only it wasn’t caviar.

Oh how I wish it had been caviar.

Wondering what this booger-like stuff was and where it was coming from, I examined Nathan’s diaper and noticed it had a 4″ rip in the side. When I peered inside this anomaly, I noticed that apparently, the stuff they use to absorb the pee looks like little tiny gel pellets once it comes in contact with liquid.

The liquid these pellets were swelled with was URINE.

So I had little squishy, yellow, booger-like pee-pellets all over my hand. And on his leg, too. I looked around and noticed that the pee pellets were all over the bedroom floor. I felt my heart drop into my stomach as my eyes roamed from the bedroom floor to the kitchen floor. There were pee pellets everywhere. Perhaps MILLIONS OF THEM. Glistening, shiny, and swollen with pale yellow urine. In the kitchen. In the living room. In the recliner that’s in the living room. And in fact, there was a little PILE of shimmering pee pellets ON THE RECLINER. Like Nathan had taken a dump and instead of leaving poop, he left pee pellets.

There were pee pellets EVERYWHERE.

And as I walked from his bedroom and into the kitchen, I stepped on them. Barefoot. I was walking on little balls of urine. I could feel them squishing coldly under my feet. It was a very unpleasant sensation and it felt very much how I imagine walking on dead baby jellyfish might feel like.

Even worse than the aquatic mental imagery was that we couldn’t just haul out the vacuum and vacuum it up because WHO WANTS A PEE IN THEIR VACUUM? Not me. So we had to go around and manually pick up Nathan’s little balls of pee with our bare hands.

So. We won’t be buying that particular brand diaper anymore, that’s for sure. Because picking up someone’s pee pellets just ONCE in a lifetime is one time too many.

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A happy boy

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So, remember Friday how I felt like Nathan developed a burn/rash problem from the new Pampers Cruisers DryMax diapers we switched him to? Well, I told you guys we switched back to Pampers Baby Dry diapers and have used hydrocortisone cream 1% and then petroleum jelly once he started to heal, and his skin problems are almost gone now! There’s still a little redness and tenderness there, but the majority of it has healed.

Nathan is MUCH happier. Thank God. Because I really, REALLY don’t like to see my child in pain.

I sent Pampers an email and also contacted them via phone, and to their credit, the lady I spoke to was quite nice and apologized for the problem. I asked if they were thinking about taking the DryMax off the shelves and reverting to the old Cruisers (which we loved using on Nathan) but she said at this time, no they are not. In fact, they aren’t making any more diapers without the DryMax. Which is a bummer because I really liked the Cruisers.

I wish I knew why Nathan had such reaction to (what I felt was) the diapers.

All I know is that I change Nathan’s diaper almost immediately after he wets it. Paul and I have always been seriously on top of the whole diaper changes, which is why Nathan never, ever had a diaper rash of more than two or three little bumps that we were able to eradicate in a matter of a day or so. (Unfortunately, we can’t prevent diaper rashes 100% since we don’t know the very second Nathan wets himself, and with him being mobile and all, the diaper rubs against the wetness and causes mild rashes.) I was flummoxed when I saw the skin on his bottom turn bright red and starting to blister and even peel, something I had never seen before on him. It most definitely was not your average diaper rash. It was more like a burn than anything. And what really befuddled me was how quickly it worsened because I was changing his diaper within 5-10 minutes of him wetting himself. So I was at a loss as to why he had a this strange skin aberration in the first place, and especially worried about the severity of it.

I’m just glad I caught it before it got worse. I’m also appreciative that Pampers listened to what I had to say and documented my complaint. Hopefully, they can get to the bottom of this and fix it. Because the new DryMax technology would be pretty cool if they could figure out how to stop these painful reactions.

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The Grossest of All The Gross Grossnesses

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Poop.

It’s a daily occurrence. I cannot escape it; I have learned to just hold my breath and deal with it. But now, I have something to tell you that’s even funnier than Nathan’s Pooping Episodes.

Can you believe it? Something that’s funnier than poop exploding from the back of a diaper?

So this story starts off with, you guessed it, poop. But it doesn’t end there.

I was changing Nathan’s diaper. A poop diaper. That had exploded with poop shooting of the back of his diaper and all over his back and his clothes. So I removed his soiled clothes and was holding his ankles with my left hand and cleaning up his mess with my right. It was CAKED all over his back, so I had to lift his legs high into the air in order to get his back clean.

Nathan was crying his poor little head off. I am apparently raising a baby cow because his poop sometimes has this pervasive manure-like smell, and the worse his poop smells, the more he seems to cry and protest when I change his diaper.

I don’t blame him. I don’t like smelling it, either.

So Nathan was crying up a storm while I was holding his legs and cleaning his back, when all of a sudden, he made this sound like a surprised yelp followed by a short gurgle. I put his legs down and noticed the poor little guy had smeared his tears all over his face and chest.

Wait a minute.

That wasn’t tears glistening on his face and chest. Or puddled around his head.

IT WAS PEE.  Huge puddles of Nathan Pee were everywhere. He was pretty much SWIMMING IN IT… it was all over his face, his torso, and arms. And his head was resting in a puddle. And remember how I said that I was in the process of cleaning Nathan up when this happened? WELL, I WASN’T DONE. So there was some pee that had run down onto his back, making the remaining poop this viscous, brown funk that smeared everywhere… and it was quite possibly the Grossest of All the Gross Grossnesses.

Don’t scoff at a pee-poop mixture. If you have yet to deal with this, YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU’RE IN FOR.

With a heavy sigh, because ya know, this kind of stuff always seems to happen, I cleaned up the entire mess and had Nathan dry and happy in a few minutes, and he seemed to forget about the whole ordeal in a matter of seconds.

But I will never forget. No, I will never forget the day that my son peed on his own face.

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