Posts tagged patience

As Time Progresses

Nathan going through this big Separation Anxiety phase right now, so I’ve been having to carry him around a lot. Because if I don’t, the little guys just cries his little heart out, as if the lack of my presence is the most painful thing he’s ever endured IN HIS LIFE.

Oh, little guy. There are so many other things in life that are so much worse than Mommy taking 2 minutes to PEE.

I’ve had to carry him around so much so that I swear my right arm has become significantly stronger than my left one. Hopefully, it won’t be as obvious as that dude from Lady in the Water, though. I thought the size difference in his arms was just creepy.

But you know what? Nathan totally makes up for this semi- frustrating phase by doing some really super duper cute things. For instance, he hasn’t mastered the whole bending over thing, so when he’s holding onto the coffee table and drops a toy, he’ll slowly move his legs into the splits until he’s low enough to retrieve his toy. And all the bubbly noises he makes as he plays with his toys are just downright adorable. So are those cheeky grins and his laughter that is so hearty that it often reverberates throughout the room.

How I love watching him develop. I get so nostalgic watching him play sometimes because as I watch him, I’m thinking about how just BARELY A YEAR AGO, he was this tiny, helpless, and very loud miniature human who couldn’t even hold his head up on his own, much less make his way around a room.

I am in constant awe at how quickly the time passes.

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To Chew or Not to Chew

 

No matter what it is, he finds a way to chew on anything. I’m finding little teeth marks all over the place… on toys, the crib rails, his books, MY CHEEK… He keeps tricking me. He’ll open his mouth and look at me, like what he does when he wants to give me a kiss, so I’ll lean in and give him my cheek to kiss. Instead, I get BITTEN. By sharp little baby teeth.

I’m looking forward to all his teeth finally coming in!

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Tester of Boundaries

Nathan definitely has a stubborn streak in him (I have NO IDEA WHERE HE GETS THAT. Cough, cough). After all, any baby who HOLDS IN HIS POOP is pretty damn stubborn. Nathan gets it in his head what he wants to do and nothing, I mean nothing, will change his mind.

He’s decided that he’s going to figure out some way to touch all the things I say he can’t touch, which includes the entertainment center. When he crawls up to it, I always say Don’t touch that, Nathan. At first, he would touch it anyway, resulting in him being moved to another place in the living room. So then he got to where when I would say Don’t touch, he would plop down on his bottom and stare sadly at the off-limits item for a few minutes before he would forget and try to touch it again.

But now, my little guy is trying to outwit me.

Now, he KNOWS what is off limits. So now, instead of directly touching something he knows he’s not supposed to, he’ll get his index finger as close to it as he can WITHOUT ACTUALLY TOUCHING IT. For instance, he knows everything on the entertainment center is off limits, but he tries to test me by putting his finger A HAIR AWAY from the off-limits object, like the DVD player or the DVR. He won’t actually touch it, but it will be MILLIMETERS from actual contact.

FREAKING MILLIMETERS, GUYS. So close that at first glace, it looks like he’s actually touching it.

Yes, he still gets reprimanded for it. I tell him if he can’t actually touch an object, he can’t FAKE TOUCH IT, EITHER.

So then, once he figured out that he can’t FAKE TOUCH what’s off limits, he started touching them WITH OTHER OBJECTS. I’m sure he’s thinking, well, I’M not touching it… my (toy, stuffed animal, etc) is touching it. So he’ll take one of his toys and will use it to touch the items that he’s not allowed to touch. Like his toys are becoming his FINGER PROXIES.

AND HE WILL LOOK RIGHT AT ME WHILE HE’S DOING IT.

As if to say, Look mom! I’m not touching! I can’t get in trouble if I’m not physically touching it!

Yeah,  Nathan. You can’t do that either, my mischievous little guy. You cannot make your toys into proxies on your behalf, son.

He’s definitely in the Boundary Testing Phase. He knows, KNOWS, that he’s not allowed to touch certain things, and yet he tries to find loopholes in the rules, looking for other ways he can touch said object. Or trying to see just how close I will let him get to touching it.

I have my hands full with this little guy.

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Life With a One Year Old

As of next week, my little baby will no longer be considered an infant. Now, it’s life with a ONE YEAR OLD.

And it can be really frustrating, I think mostly because Nathan has all these emotions and feelings but he has no way to communicate them. One minute, he’s my sweet little guy… all smiles and dripping drool. The very next minute, he’s like an animal… howling, screeching, pinching, smacking, and simply being defiant.

And it can be over something as simple as feeding him something like pears.

It doesn’t matter that yesterday, pears were his favorite food. Because today, they are NOT his favorite food. And I’m his mother, so apparently, I’m supposed to be his personal mind-reader, because he acts like he simply CANNOT believe that I would have the utter audacity to GIVE HIM PEARS.

And don’t even get me started on diaper changes.

He used to be fine with them. Then one day, out of the clear blue, he suddenly turned into this wriggling snake-like being who defied the changing-table restraint straps like a force to be reckoned with. What used to take only a couple of minutes has now turned into a battle of wills.

Nathan does not want his diaper changed.

I do.

So he twists and contorts and screams, and I coax and cajole and try to be as fast as I can.

And when Nathan and I are just hanging out and playing, sometimes he’ll push me away when I try to hug him. I try not to take it personally because, hell, he’s only a year old and has no concept of other people’s feelings. But when I bend over to hug him or pick him up and he pushes me away, I can’t help but feel like little pang of sadness.

My baby wants to be independent.

And when he’s in the floor playing with the toys that surround him, he’ll suddenly get upset for whatever reason. And he will slap his toys away, throw his arm dramatically over his eyes, and cry while intermittently peeking out from under his arm to make sure I’m watching this spectacle.

But he also has his really sweet moments… moments that make my heart swell up with so much love that it feels like I’m about to float away on a wispy cloud of pure bliss. Like when we wake up from a nap and he rubs my cheek every so gently.

With a hand coated in slobber.

But then he forgets he’s supposed to be gentle when touching my face and will smack me out of sheer… love. Can you believe it? He loves me so much that he gets super excited and starts smacking my face. I tried explaining that domestic violence isn’t how you show love, but of course he doesn’t quite get that concept.

Sometimes he even tries to yank off my lips. AS IF THEY ARE DETACHABLE.

It’s absolutely amazing watching him grow. A year ago, he was 100% dependant on me for every single thing. Now? Now, he’s becoming a little more independent each day. I’ve watched him grow from this helpless little being into someone with his own personality and his own wants and needs. I’ve watched him learn how to roll over, how to sit up, how to crawl… and I cry a little (JUST A LITTLE) each time he masters a new skill.

And nothing beats when he wraps his little arms around my neck and gives me a hug or nestles into my hair.

Ah, living life with a one-year old. It’s never, ever dull. Or boring.

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