life with a new baby
Posts tagged humor
Beauty salon adventures
Oct 6th
Last week, I had to get my bangs trimmed. Since I didn’t have a babysitter, I took Nathan with me. It was the first time he’d ever accompanied me to the hairdresser’s… and it was hilarious. To contain him and prevent too many mishaps, I told him to stand in front of me, in between the hairdressers’ stands. He complied as he watched my bangs get cut, which completely fascinated him.
“Cut hair! Cut hair!” he exclaimed.
“Yes, I’m getting my hair cut,” I replied. “But that’s something we don’t do ourselves. We leave it to the professionals.” You know, the whole kids-with-scissors thing? Not cool. I don’t want him hacking away at his hair… although I know it’s inevitable. So then as she was cutting my bangs, my hair trimmings fell onto the cape. Nathan, of course, picks up one corner of my cape and violently flaps it in the air, launching my hair trimmings in all directions.
“Please leave Mommy’s cape alone,” I said. “It’s not polite to shake all the hair off.”
“Ok, I sorry,” he replied. And he stood back, intently watching the as the scissors continued to snip.
Fortunately, that was the only setback he had. After that, my bangs were done and we were ready to leave. I love my little boy, and I love these little adventures that we experience together. Speaking of adventures, he has grown a baby mullet and is in need of his FIRST haircut! We haven’t had his hair cut yet because it took so long for his hair to grow. He was bald for the longest time, so cutting his hair will be bittersweet. He’s crossed the threshold into boyhoood… I can’t believe how fast he’s growing up.
Opposite Day. I mean week. I mean month.
Sep 28th
I think Nathan must be going through something like an Opposite Phase. He says exactly the opposite of what he means.
Me: “Nathan, you’re not minding me. Do you want time out?”
Nathan: “Yes!”
Me: “You do? You want time out?”
Nathan: “YES!”
Me: “Fine. Go to time out.”
Nathan: “Yes, Mommy! I sorry! Yes, yes timeout!” (while throwing a temper tantrum and flopping around like a fish-out-of-water on the floor)
Me: “You don’t REALLY want time out, do you? Don’t say yes unless you REALLY want time out.”
Nathan: “Yes.”
Me: “…”
The above conversation is something I deal with every day, multiple times a day. It can really be enough to drive someone crazy, especially when temper tantrums are thrown into the mix. He knows darn good and well what the word “yes” means, so I don’t know why he is using it the wrong way. Unless he’s trying to test me. That is TOTALLY Nathan. He is my little tester… constantly testing his boundaries to see exactly how much he can get away with. Unfortunately, he does not realize that Mommy is not amused (and is, in fact, the OPPOSITE of amused) at his antics.
Getting Underfoot
Sep 27th
Why is it whenever you are busy doing something (such as making lunch), children have this inexplicable desire to stand RIGHT behind you in the exact spot where you can’t see them, causing you to trip over them, bump into them, or accidentally knock them down as you bustle about the room? Nathan has this bad habit of getting “under foot” as my mom used to say, and it’s driving me nuts. It’s like he somehow knows EXACTLY where to stand to be EXACTLY in my way. I know it’s completely unintentional, but that doesn’t make it any less irritating!
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