Archive for March, 2011
Yesterday, Paul put Nathan in time out for throwing his toys. He explained to Nathan that he’s not allowed to throw things, and the next time he does it, he’ll go right back into time out. Well lo-and-behold, guess who threw his toys again? So Nathan got put in time out once more. But that time Nathan got put in time out, he said, “I sawee! I sawee” (I’m sorry! I’m sorry!) while frantically signing “sorry” in sign language. And then? Then he looks at me and says “Mama, pweese! Pweese! I sawee!” (Mama, please! Please! I’m sorry!) And then you know what happened?
I DIED A LITTLE INSIDE.
Because it completely breaks my heart to discipline my son and see those tears splashing down his cheeks. But you know what? It’s not about me. It’s about what’s best for Nathan. And it is absolutely NOT in his best interest for me to be self-centered, refusing to discipline him because disciplining him makes me feel bad, while it harms him in the long run by turning him into an entitled, self-absorbed, spoiled, bratty adult.
There are way too may of those in the world today, you guys feel me?
Children are a blank piece of paper. We, as the parents, write on that paper who our children are going to become as adults. I want Nathan to understand that there are consequences for everything that he does. Some of those consequences are good. Others are bad. And as much as it breaks my heart to discipline him and see those glistening tears cascading down his little cheeks, I know that it has to be done.
But you know what? He is one happy kid. Seriously. He knows he’s loved, because we set limits with him. He needs that security, and he is thriving. And, if I do say so myself, although he has his typical toddler fits, I have a wonderful, precious, sweet, kind, and loving child who I love more than life itself.
So yesterday, I took Nathan to Paul’s work so Paul could show him around the place while I got my registration for my car renewed. Unfortunately, Nathan had other ideas in mind. He started crying when they went into the building and then threw a complete temper tantrum when Paul tried to walk him down a particular hall. (Why do kids do that anyway?) We had planned to eat lunch together at a local bistro that we hadn’t tried yet, but Nathan was in such a foul mood from his experience that, unfortunately, we couldn’t even order our food! Nathan was crying so much and was so obstreperous that just a few minutes after we sat down, we had to get up and leave. It was very disappointing, and we’ve never had to actually leave a restaurant before we could even eat. (Although there have been many times where Paul and I had to shovel down the last bites of our food because of Nathan’s behavior.)
That’s the life of a parent, though. Especially a parent with a two-year-old. I’ve been told by many people that the three’s are worse… I really hope not. Because whoever coined the term “The Terrible Two’s” was not joking around. Nathan is such a sweet, loving, kind-hearted little gentleman 90% of the time… but the remaining 10% of the time? HE IS ROTTEN!!! We’re working with him on correcting this behavior (I cannot even imagine what kind of adult he would be if we allowed this behavior to continue… what are some parents thinking?!) so sooner or later, there will be an improvement. Until then, I just shake my head, hold him close, and tell myself that this stage won’t last forever.
You can always tell when your server is unaccustomed to kids… they seem to be blissfully unaware of the havoc a child can wreak when items are placed within the child’s reach. The other day, the server set my tea down in front of Nathan, so guess who stuck their hand into my drink? I’ll give you a hint. IT WASN’T ME.