If you have children, I’m sure you’ve crossed paths with the infamous wild-eyed lunatic mom who condemned you for one decision or another that you made concerning your child and your decisions on parenting. Before I became pregnant, I had never heard of the Mommy Wars. Mommy Wars are “controversial” topics that mommies all over America fight tooth and nail about. The word controversial is in quotes because I still to this day do not see why some of the topics moms fight about are considered so… controversial. I’m the type of person who keeps her nose in her own business unless a child’s actual physical or emotional well-being is at stake. Generally speaking, parents love their children and would never do anything to intentionally hurt them. However, before anyone starts shooting at me with screaming Words of Wisdom about the evil atrocities in this world, I am very aware of how rampant child abuse is. That being said, if a child is loved, happy, and the parents are not causing them physical or emotional pain, let them do their job.

My dad used to always tell me, “There’s no handbook on how to raise kids. We can only do what we know to do and hope it turns out for the best.”  How right he was. I’ve known so many mommies who stepped into arguments over how the other should raise their child that were so heated that Hell itself is no comparison. Eyes glinting with murderous intent, hair flying, voices shrill and piercing, veins bulging from foreheads… and that’s mild.

If you inadvertently step into a Mommy War on the Internet, look out. To these psycho, soul-devouring mommies, all is fair game in this war. They will attack you, your spouse, your children, your parents, your pets, your hair follicles… They will slice you and dice you with a rusty table saw, dance naked in your steaming blood, and feed your remnants to hyenas for dinner.

If you have never heard of these wars, consider yourself lucky. If you’ve never been involved in one, consider yourself touched by God.  If you find yourself constantly belittling and berating other moms for their parenting decisions, I urge you to check yourself into your local nuthouse, PRONTO.

In my not so humble opinion, Mommy Wars are spurred by women who are insecure in the choices they make as parents, jealousy, and because for some reason, women like to berate other women. It’s like being tossed back into high school, only you’re stuck with adults rather than teenagers. Whenever I inadvertently step into one of their steaming piles of menacing words, I think of my precious son, how much I love him, and how very happy he is.

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